Games To Encourage Thinking Skills

There is no doubt about it, using computer games is a great way to encourage children to expand their realm of thinking. Your options for entertaining your child may seem numbered. Many people allow their children to spend quite a bit of time in front of the television. But, what good does that do? If you want them to learn something while they are zoned out, you are completely lost. But, if you flip on the computer, download a great game, you may actually be able to encourage them to learn more and you will encourage good thinking skills as well.

Thinking is not something that everyone can do well. Now, we are referring here to the thought process that goes along with solving problems. For many children, this is something they struggle with. Mom or Dad always takes care of the problems. If something isn't right, just call mom or dad. Even on the television, that is full of real life and imaginary "problems" that need to be solved, there is no encouragement for children to come up with the solution. What happens then? They just sit and watch and let someone else handle the problem.

But, what happens when they are older or in a situation where they have to solve the problem at hand? Do they know how to analyze their thoughts, ideas, and to find the right solution? Many don't. But, if you would like your child to be the one who does know how to flip the switch on and solve the problem, consider allowing them to sit in front of the computer as opposed to the television.

Okay, so too much time in front of the computer isn't much better, but there are ways to you make what time you do allow them to sit at the computer to be good times. This is you simply need to maximize what they are doing. There are several good games out there that can be used to stimulate thinking in children. For many people, this is the perfect way to go to encourage children to learn how to solve problems without letting them in on it! Yes, because games are fun, the child will not fight you on playing them. Much unlike a lesson plan, this way seems to encourage children to come back to the game time and time again, therefore getting the experiences they need to learn a thing or two.

But, what are these games? What are the options that are out there for your child? There are many games, and although we will only talk about a few here, find ones that will work well with your child. What are his or her likes and dislikes? Sports? Television characters? Perhaps they enjoy space or under water adventures. Search out those games that will intrigue them as well as encourage them to think.

Some to consider include 'Big Thinkers Kindergarten' and the series of Freddi Fish Adventures as well as many other games specifically for children. These are mainly for younger children, but you'll find many more for older children as well. In fact, consider giving your older kids more puzzle related games to help them along this course as well.

When you give your child the gift of being a problem solver, they will work through the situations that happen to them, big and small, without fear of not knowing how to handle them. They will be more likely to do well in the real world then. What's more is that you can feel good about all that time they spend in front of the tube (even though it's the computer not the television!)

by Steve Hall

The Challenges of Single Parenting

Having worked with parents for the last 35 years and written books on parenting and relationships, I’ve discovered that one of the greatest challenges for us as parents is to be loving role-models for our children, showing our children through our behavior how to take personal responsibility for their own feelings and needs. Our children need to learn from our role-modeling how to nurture themselves within and how to create a sense of safety in the world. In families where both a mother and father are present, both parents can participate in nurturing the child emotionally and taking care of the child in the world, and both parents can role-model what it looks like to do this for themselves.

Single parents have a far greater challenge - they have to be both mother and father to the child. Mothering energy is that energy that nurtures while fathering energy is that energy that protects in the world - that is, earning money, setting boundaries with others, speaking up for oneself. While our society often defines women as the nurturers and men as the protectors, both men and women are capable of both nurturing and protecting in the world.

In order for a single parent to successfully be both mother and father, he or she must have learned how to be both mother and father to the Child within. In other words, we have to have learned how to nurture our own Inner Child - how to take responsibility for our own fears, pain, anger, hurt, and disappointment, and how to take care of our Inner Child in the world - earn money, set boundaries, and so on. There is no way to successfully teach our children these skills until we are doing them ourselves, which means that each of us needs to be in a process of learning how to do this.

We have developed a process that teaches us how to care for and nurture ourselves, while also loving others. This process, called Inner Bonding, teaches us how to become a loving Adult to our own Inner Child and to our actual children. Inner Bonding is a six-step psychospiritual process that can be learned and practiced daily, and that leads to the development of a spiritually-connected loving inner Adult.

Inner Bonding defines the Inner Child as our core self, who we are when we are born - our natural creativity, intuition, playfulness, imagination, talents, feelings, and ability to love. Our Child is our inner experience. Our Adult is everything we learn after we are born. It is our thoughts, beliefs, and ability to take action. We start learning how to be an Adult from the moment we are born through watching our parents and other caregivers. The Adult we learn to be is a child-adult, the part of us that learned many fears and false beliefs and learned addictive ways, such as using substances, TV, spending, anger, or compliance to avoid pain. A true loving Adult is that part of us that is spiritually connected to a Higher Source of truth and love and is able to bring that truth and love down into the Child and share it with others. The adult many of us operate from most of the time is really a wounded child masquerading as an adult. It is our unhealed wounded self that causes us problems with ourselves and our children. Inner Bonding is a process for healing the wounded self and developing a spiritually-connected loving Adult.

In Inner Bonding, there are only two possible intents at any given moment: the intent to learn about love and the intent to protect against and avoid pain. The intent to learn says that we want to learn about our own pain in order to understand what we need to do to be loving to our Inner Child and others; The intent to protect says that we want to avoid experiencing our pain at all cost. The child-adult is always in the intent to protect and the loving Adult is always in the intent to learn.

The six-steps of Inner Bonding are:

1. The willingness to become aware of our pain rather than protect against it with our various addictions.
2. The conscious decision to move into the intent to learn.
3. Dialoguing with our wounded self to discover the false beliefs and resulting behavior behind the pain. Releasing anger and pain in appropriate ways.
4. Dialoguing with our Higher Power to learn about truth and loving behavior.
5. Taking loving action in behalf or our Inner Child.
6. Evaluating the action.

All parents needs to be in a process of healing themselves. It is particularly important for single parents to be in this process since they are the primary role-models for their children. The more you heal the fears and false beliefs of your wounded self, the more loving you will naturally be with yourself and your children. Learning to utilize these six step throughout the day, especially in times of anger, fear, anxiety and stress, will eventually heal the false beliefs leading to these difficult feelings.

The Truth About Layettes

Recently, I was at a baby shower for a young friend of mine who is expecting her first child. Most of the attendees were college friends of ours, and almost no one in the room has had a child yet. Needless to say, some of the gifts took some explaining. For many young mothers, some necessities may come as a surprise. In fact many may not know what the phrase "baby layette" means. For those, and for those who just feel like a checklist would make them feel more prepared, here are the basic things that an expectant mother and father should have waiting for the new bundle of joy.

It is important to have between four and six of all of your baby's basic daily needs. Things like undershirts, sleeping gowns, onesies, footsie pajamas, receiving blankets, hooded towels, socks, washcloths, and daily clothing will be key, since your laundry needs are going to multiply exponentially. You don't want to be caught in the middle of a load of laundry with a baby who has just spit up his or her lunch on her last clean shirt.

A going home outfit is of great importance, since it is the first time a lot of relatives and friends will see your baby. Not only will there be lots of photos, but there is a lot of sentimentality attached to this particular item. Other individual items to have on hand in the new baby's nursery are a crib with adjustable settings that can change to meet the needs of your growing (and ever the more clever) baby. You will, for the baby's bedding need a crib or bassinette with at least two to four crib or bassinette sheets, a crib bumper, and two to three crib blankets. You may want to consider adding a dust ruffle and some waterproof pads for the crib. These are not necessary at first, but you will need them later. A playpen for bringing the new family member along to friend's houses, family gatherings, or even just to the park or in another room of the house is a convenience that is great for keeping just a little bit of me time in those early months.

While with baby clothes, you should stock up on sizes three to six months (in case the baby is larger than the average newborn, or grows rather quickly), you want to have at least one large box of newborn sized diapers on hand when the baby arrives home. You may want to stock up in the event of a sale, but you don't want to buy too many, in case the baby is too large for them.

You also want to keep some other essentials in mind for changing/bathing. Two to three bottles of baby shampoo will get you off to a good start, along with a bottle of baby oil, a bottle of baby lotion, baby powder (corn starch is a great bulk alternative), and one tube of zinc oxide for diaper rash. Even if you are breastfeeding, you want to have 6-12 bottles with nipples and collars (and some extra nipples on hand if you are not breastfeeding). These are the absolute basics. It may seem like a lot, but being prepared with these necessities will make your transition into parenting much easier.

by Kirsten Hawkins

Are Your Parenting Skills Good Enough?

The preparation of having a baby is overwhelming, buying bottles, diapers, clothes and setting up the nursery, it is life long preparations in a way because we learn from our own parents and how we were raised.

Throughout this process you will find yourself daydreaming about beautiful days spend with your child and playing with them, but put all those dreams on hold for now. Those thoughts you had are all lovely but real life is not so. Parenting skills is also a requirement in the preparation process, and you better make sure you have good ones.

Being a Parent

The moment conception happens, your extremely challenging but gratifying job as a parent begins. This job is not a job you can quit when you do not like it anymore. It is a life long experience that rides on a rollercoaster, with sky high thrills and heart breaking downhill's all throughout the way. To assist your child in learning how to cope with life and the ups and downs to it, you will need your parenting skills to kick in and guide you on the right path. This path will also lead you to self comfort in those difficult situations you will face in the future with your children.

You can't go to the store and buy parenting skills, you can't download it form the internet in a neat package, this is something you must become skilled at and gain. In order to become the parent you desire to be, you must investigate, allow us to help guide you where to look and get your questions answered:

Knowing you own kid, we all are different, and have unique character aspects that identifies us to be ourselves. We discovered that most children will copy their parents, and desire to follow into their footsteps, but then again there are those who do not want to be like their parents and defy. The children that rebel against what you have been used to are the ones you will need good parenting skills with, they will upset you and leave you discouraged at times.

Rediscover your inner child, you need to step inside your children's shoes and remember what it was like to be a child, this is called rediscovering your inner child. You tend to forget how to relax and then get stuck in a bored lifestyle and stressful jobs. The best way to understand the issues at hand with your children is to place yourself in their shoes, and see things from their own perspective; you will then gain an understanding for how they are feeling and why they are rebelling. Good parenting skills will teach you how to listen to your child's demands and not relinquish to them, but how to stand strong and view the issue in your child's eyes and come to a solution that pleases both of you.

Some things that you will learn with good parenting skills is when to allow your child to win and when to make sure she loses in the battles you will face. There will be times when you have to disapprove of your child's actions or attitude, but you do not want to this in a way that it will traumatize the child. Too much criticism is not good for any parent/child relationship.

Interested? Keep Reading To Discover Where To Find Good Parenting Skills

Who better to find out how to solve your parenting issues than to talk to someone who has went through it before? Online nowadays there are forums available, some with chat option, to find others who are already experienced in those problems you think are impossible to overcome. There are thousands of websites about parenting or related to parenting and you can find nearly any type of situation possible. Look at how others ended their issues; what their solution was and see if that may work for you as well.

Naturally, all this information cannot be processed by our brains in a day, it will probably take you a lifetime of learning, suffering and rejoicing before it is successful. The important thing to keep in mind is to never give up, and as long as you are open minded you have won half the battle already.

by Clive Jenkins

Discipline - Be Clear, Be Firm, Be Consistent

Children learn best by being given clear, firm and consistent direction from parents who are clear, firm and consistent in their approach.

How to Discipline Children by Being Clear:

Firstly find and maintain clarity within yourself and then follow through on simple, clear instructions. Clarify for your self what being clear means.

It is about being plain, obvious, and understandable in a clear, short sentence that explains exactly what you mean.

It isn't about maybe this or maybe that.

Often parents have no idea that they chop and change their minds within minutes. To become clear about your own patterns of behavior, observe yourself and ask for your partner's help in this.

"We are going to tidy up your toys in five minutes", is clear and direct. Follow this with,

"Please help me tidy up your toys now" and it means just that.

Be firm with yourself about this. It doesn't mean soon, or later, but now.

I have seen parents give out this simple instruction, then become distracted themselves by a television program, conversation or magazine. What their children observe is parents saying one thing and doing another and this gives a much distorted message. Multiplied over many times each day, is it any wonder that children cease to follow simple instructions?

How to Discipline Children by Being Firm:

Firstly find and maintain firmness for yourself and then follow through with firm clear directions in a firm, clear tone.

Clarify for your self what being firm means.

To be firm is to be certain, definite, and determined. It is also being loving, kind and calm.

It means saying no and meaning no, or saying yes and meaning yes and sticking to it. It's about now being now. How often does your no become perhaps, later, maybe giving in, next time, soon, or alright then? This is a very common fault in how to discipline children and again it leads to numerous mixed messages for children.

Resolve within yourself and with your partner's help to ascertain how often you are both easily swayed into changing your decisions. Are you allowing your children to manipulate you? Imagine how simple your life will become when you are clear and firm within yourself.

It is every child's right to KNOW they can trust their parent's boundaries. So firstly, become firm with your own boundaries and then apply this to your parenting discipline.

"It is bedtime, (bath time, meal time) in five minutes" is a clear direction. Now follow through on this.

Giving the direction in a calm, clear, firm tone of voice helps your children to understand that you mean what you say. Being firm is about being in control of both yourself and the situation.

How to Discipline Children by Being Consistent:

Firstly find and maintain consistency for yourself and then follow through with a firm, clear, consistent approach.

Clarify for yourself what being consistent means.

To be consistent is to be reliable, dependable and constant.

These words immediately convey comfort don't they?

Let's look at the opposite of being consistent. Contradictory, unpredictable, changeable. That's definitely lacking in comfort and safety.

So how do you want to be seen by your children?

To begin with it can seem quite time consuming to concentrate on clear, firm, consistent guidelines. Be aware that this is very true. It takes concentrated effort and time to change old habits to new ones, but if you maintain consistency, you will be very surprised how quickly new patterns of behavior are formed.

Parenting Discipline In Summary: With parenting discipline we are teaching our children how to have self control, self discipline and to become self reliant, so they are able to make good choices for themselves.

The only way children can learn to do this is by being given the opportunities for this learning.

This means not over protecting them, or doing everything for them, but maximizing their opportunities to learn through personal experience and observation, even when this means making mistakes.

Can you see the opportunities here to change some of your own patterns of behavior into superior ones?

Clear, firm, consistent parenting is quality parenting. You learn to trust your own responses and your children are surrounded by your loving constancy.

This is the recipe for creating a happy, well adjusted family.